Gooooood Mooooorning Madisoooon....and surrounding areas. Could someone please, oh pretty please with sugar on top, please tell me how it is that ya'll live in a state where there is friggin' snow on the ground nearly half the year and yet when we get 1/10 of an inch of rain, everyone drives at half the speed limit?!?

It's called rain, this is what happens when clouds hold too much moisture. This is how the Earth stays fresh, this is what helps make things grow. This isn't some 9 wonder from the 16th dimesion folks. It's wet, its heavier than air so it comes down from the sky. It's w-a-t-e-r, say it with me, *water*, I knew you could!

Now I can understand, if that water is in ice form, but let me clue you in on something...ice forms at 32-degrees Fahrenheit. According to my weather applet, its 46-degrees Fahrenheit at the moment...some quick math tells me that we are 14-degrees above the point that water begins to form ice. (That's 46 - 32 = 14, use a calculator if need be...but not while your driving please).

The driving conditions out there today aren't even close to hazardous, nowhere near where going to be in another month or so, what the hell are ya gonna do then? Here's some suggestions:

• MOVE -- preferably somewhere far away and south. The southern states usually don't get that much snow
• Take the bus -- I don't care, but please get out from behind the wheel and off the road
• Ski -- again, I don't care, but get off the road
• Sell your car and any other modern device you may own and move to Amish Country, buy a horse and buggy so the horse can do the driving and not you.

I hope you found this tidbit helpful and that you refer to it as often as possible. Put these ideas in your mind and always be conscious of them....and for the love of all that is friggin good, get outta the way!